Why My TEDx Talk Almost Didn’t Happen

Behind the scenes

For eight years, I quietly carried a goal I wasn’t sure I would ever reach.

I applied for TEDx talks. I received rejection after rejection. I rewrote ideas. I changed topics. I told myself I would try again.

And then, slowly, I stopped. Not because I ran out of ideas. But because I ran out of belief.

Back in 2018, I submitted my first TEDx proposal video. At the time, I thought it was solid. Looking back now, it’s uncomfortable to watch.

It wasn’t ready.

When the rejection came, I told myself it was fine. That timing mattered. That something better would come along. But if I’m honest, part of me quietly decided that this dream just might not be for me.

Life moved on. Career. Responsibility. Progress that looked good on paper. And the goal stayed on the shelf.

Earlier this year, an email landed in my inbox about a TEDx pitch competition. My first instinct was to ignore it. I had learned how to protect myself from disappointment.

But something in me said, Why not?

I signed up. Nervous. Unsure. Trying not to get my hopes up. And somehow, I won.

That moment secured my spot at TEDxWarrenton. Eight years after my first attempt.

Once I was selected, the real work began.

The Work Begins

I hired a coach, Cesar Cervantes, and started building the talk. When I completed the first full script, anxiety hit hard. Memorizing a 12-minute talk felt overwhelming.

Every word felt heavy.

Every pause felt critical.

The pressure was real.

What I didn’t realize at the time was how closely this fear mirrored the message I was preparing to share. The talk explores why rest can feel unsafe, especially for high achievers, first-generation professionals, women, and people of color. And here I was, unable to slow down or fully trust myself, carrying the same nervous system patterns I was about to name on stage.

I knew I couldn’t waste the opportunity. So I committed.

I practiced in front of family and friends. I simulated the stage. I visualized the moment every morning and replayed it during sauna sessions. I even cut the script into pieces and placed them around my home to train my memory.

It wasn’t graceful. It wasn’t pretty. But it was honest.

Day by day, momentum replaced fear.

Memorizing the talk didn’t just test my memory. It tested my willingness to trust myself under pressure.

Slowly, the nerves gave way to excitement. Not because the fear disappeared, but because I learned to stay present with it.

Presence. Patience. Persistence.

When I finally walked on stage in October, I wasn’t thinking about perfection. I was thinking about the eight years it took me to believe I belonged there. And how close I came to never finding out.

Staying With It

My TEDx talk, Why Rest Feels Unsafe (And What to Do About It), is now live. It explores burnout, nervous system patterns, and redefining success. But underneath all of that, it’s really about self-trust. Trusting your voice. Trusting your timing. Trusting yourself enough to stay with the thing that keeps calling you.

You can watch the talk here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqPTonhA5J0&t=19s

And sometimes the thing we almost walk away from is the thing that asks us to trust ourselves again.